Relocation to Shanghai: What you should know before moving
Written by Merav Asheri Bonaventura, traveling in Shanghai, China
A few years ago, a fan with relocation to Shanghai was offered the role of project management in the field of telecoms. After several rounds of concerns and deliberations, we finally decided to accept the challenge. We shared with the children (Itai is 9 years old, Dana is 6), hence everything rolled out quickly. Lots of logistics, a flash visit to locate a house and school, a farewell, a flight and here we are landing in Shanghai, the four of us alone, on the eve of Seder 2009, do not even begin to speculate about what we are facing.
The plan was to be there for two years, in practice we stayed over four years. And it was the most amazing family and personal experience I could ask for for us and myself. What you will read below is an attempt to summarize everything that is important to know before deciding on a move to Shanghai (or anywhere else of a similar nature) and having already been there. These points are derived from my personal and subjective experiences, because everyone experiences their relocation differently, so take them with a pinch of salt.
11 tips before moving to Shanghai
1. Before the decision – is it appropriate for you to relocate? Especially Shanghai?
Every relocation is a challenge, and it’s not for everyone. We will not dwell on this, but relocation to China is fundamentally different from relocation to a Western country, mainly for the following three reasons:
A. Language: The Chinese have difficulty communicating in English.
In. Abysmal cultural differences, which shortened the sheet from detailing here.
gimel. The absence of an Israeli and Jewish community, and therefore the need to engage in an international community is very diverse.
In our four years in Shanghai, we have known dozens of families who have come from a variety of countries up close. Some persevered and had a great time, and some gave up the experience after a short time. In retrospect, when I examine what created a positive experience for the perpetrators and for the permissiveness of a negative experience, I argue that the perpetrators found the above three points an opportunity and a challenge, while the perpetrators saw them as an obstacle and a burdensome and unnecessary burden.
Of course, there are many other objective factors that may shorten the stay (e.g. changes in the workplace), but in most cases, the relocation fails because one (or more) of the spouses or children does not find its place and this fact affects the whole family.
Therefore, before making the decision, it is necessary to examine carefully and honestly how you, as a family cell, will encounter these difficulties and be able to them.
2. Keep an open mind, adopt a positive attitude
The decision to move to China must have been not easy, but once you have received it, change records, think positive and above all, broadcast it to the children. The approach we adopted was that we were given the opportunity to recognize and live in a fascinating country, and we intend to take advantage of it. And so it was, from the first moment.
We landed on Tuesday and by Wednesday the kids were visiting the school, we planned to be there for an hour, and we found ourselves there for five hours. In the process, the head of parent-school relations informed us that a month later there would be a Global Child’s Day event, and so we found ourselves in less than 24 hours of landing in Shanghai, already planning the Israeli pavilion for the event (after all, we are a single Israeli family, if not us – there will be no Israeli pavilion). A month after our landing, Itay and Dana presented a variety of Israeli technologies at The Israel Pavilion, marched with the Israeli flag and felt that they were part of the school’s international community.
3. Avoid prejudice, get to know culture and history
The Chinese are very different, in thinking, in customs. The differences range from interesting, to strange to daunting. It is very easy to observe this reality from a place of separation, condescension based on prejudice. But such an approach would greatly harm your experience and enjoyment of the period.
Instead, I recommend opening my mind, realizing that in matters of culture there are very few black and white, but mainly shades of gray, which we see in light of our personal habits.
In my experience, understanding culture and customs begins with the knowledge of rich and complex history. It is recommended to learn a little (or much), about the relevant modern history. Books like “Wild Swans” or “Shanghai Girls” and many others are a great source of peering into this period.
After I started working among the Chinese, I read Wild Swans a second time, and then I got a lot of edges attached to help me understand how my colleagues thought. For example, extreme avoidance of taking risks and mistakes, which for us is interpreted as a lack of initiative (or “a small head”). Getting to know history reflects the fact that these people (or their parents) were educated in a completely different China, where initiative was not rewarded. On the other hand, a mistake could have been fateful. However, there are huge differences between generations, and even between sub-generations (e.g. 30+ year olds versus those aged 40+).
4. Where to live? Puxi or Pudong – The Eternal Debate
Shanghai is very big. It covers about a third of the territory of the State of Israel and is home to more than 20 million residents. During the day it translates into extremely difficult traffic, traffic jams and a crowded subway.
The city is divided by the Huangfu River to the west side (Puxi). This is the older, busy, crowded part, where the consulates and downtown of Shanghai are located. The eastern part (Pudong) is the newer part. 20 years ago there were rice fields there and today the financial center and skyscrapers are located. About 10 years ago, the High Tech Zone was also established, where many high-tech companies such as Marvell, SAP and more were established. On both sides of the city there are beautiful neighborhoods suitable for foreigners and international schools.
I strongly recommend not to listen to recommendations but to follow your personal needs. Because each family has different priorities and needs. Check where the new workplace will be and whether this part of the city has residential neighborhoods and international schools that suit you.
Shanghai is a very gridlocked city and the distances are great. In our neighborhood, there were many families living in our neighborhood that the father drove to the office about an hour each way and/or the children drove to the school for about 45 minutes each way. Since we knew that a fan would work in the High tech zone in Pudong, it was important for us to settle in this part of the city, contrary to the recommendations we received. We chose to live in Jin Qiao, a neighborhood that is mostly closed neighborhoods (compends) of foreigners. There are three international schools nearby, so our house was a 15 minute drive from Ohad’s office and a 5 minute drive from school.
In retrospect, I am so glad that we made an informed decision that suited us and contrary to the recommendations we made.
5. Be active
Usually one partner works and is very busy, and the other finds himself a lot alone. It is highly recommended to find an activity that will fill the time and add interest and challenge. The range of options is wide, from volunteer activities around the school community to full-time work in your professional field. I highly recommend learning the language, even at a minimal level so you can communicate with the locals around you.
On our second day in Shanghai, I started studying Chinese as part of a course and then went on to study literacy at the university for a year (with all the works and exams). We were a group of four women: American, Vietnamese, German and myself, who persevered in our studies for a year alongside young students from all over the world who come to learn Chinese in China. It was also an empowering experience in itself.
Itay and Dana attended a bilingual English school (English-Chinese) so they acquired the language quite quickly. The ability to communicate with the locals, travel around China, in the small villages and communicate with locals in their own language, made us very satisfied.
The other option is to live in an English bubble. I have good friends who, throughout their stay in China, did not learn Chinese and depended on the help of the driver and the assistant as interpreters.
Work: Shanghai’s foreign community is moving in a succession of those who enjoy being housewives and going to Lunch with female boarding schoolmates who integrate into full-time work. I knew lovely women who started small businesses like bag manufacturing and marketing, unique dog products, belts, and even homemade Italian food. The possibilities are numerous and each can find the balance that suits her.
In my case, after a year of university studies, I started working at ParkwayHealth, a Singaporean, global company that provides private health services throughout Asia and Shanghai are the largest in their field. I was a marketing manager and so I found myself working in the front office with dozens of Chinese colleagues and at the same time, visiting our clinics around the city.
6. Health – Preempt a cure for Mecca
Today, medicine can be found by Western standards in Shanghai. However, emergency medicine is still lacking. There are no ambulances and emergency rooms and/or trauma as we know it in Israel. Therefore, it is important to be prepared for an emergency. From first aid to an orderly list of important phones and hospital addresses in English and Chinese when necessary.
When visiting the clinic or hospital there is no need to deal with payment. Make sure that your medical insurance company directs Direct Billing with the main healthcare providers, and from there the payment is made directly by the insurance company. Just like in Israel, I had a permanent obstetrician, a pediatrician, an orthopedist, a dentist and more.
7. Help at home – a real treat, but to a degree
In China it is very common to hire a driver and a maid (known as Ayi). Also in this topic there are a variety of options, with advantages and disadvantages accordingly. English or Chinese speakers, close help (24/7) or partially. It’s definitely a great treat. The house is always clean and tidy, there are those who are responsible for driving the children to classes and friends and more. However, it is important to maintain proportions and behave with respect, and there is no need to elaborate.
In order to integrate quickly, we made sure that the driver and the maid spoke only chinese. In addition, Ohad and I issued a driver’s license. Our driver worked Monday to Friday and on weekends we were driving. Our relationship with the driver and the maid was close but not overrated. On rainy days, we found ourselves hopping the driver to his house at the end of the working day. The maid would sit down with the children and help them with their homework in Chinese, and on our holidays I made sure that she was honored with all our traditional dishes. Before we returned to Israel, we found them a job with other families, and everyone was happy.
8. Excursions – Take advantage of the opportunity
China is the third largest country in the world. There are so many fascinating places to explore. Take a walk and experience this amazing country. For four years we traveled a lot around China and still felt like we saw only a small part. Of course, there are international destinations throughout Asia, which is a shame to miss.
In Shanghai we really liked walking the small back streets and local markets and discovering the true lifestyle of ordinary locals. In addition, Shanghai has a very interesting Jewish history from the 19th century, through world wars to the rise of the Communists to power in 1949. I highly recommend the tour following Shanghai Jewry.
9. Razor in both the local and international communities
The Israeli community is limited and this opens up an opportunity to make new friends from all over the world, to learn about different cultures, religions and customs. Open your heart and mind and become international in every way.
As I mentioned earlier, during our time in Shanghai, the Israeli community in PUDONG consisted of individual families, and at school we were the only Israeli family. Thankfully, as soon as we arrived I joined the parents’ leadership team so that I immediately met new mothers/girlfriends from all over the world. We trained together in sports, went on tours and lectures, hosted and stayed.
Every year on Hanukkah, I hosted a number of families from the international community (Indians, Japanese, English, Americans, New Zealanders, Germans and more) to celebrate with us. It was usually the first time they encountered Hanukkah. At the same time, we were invited to celebrate Thanksgiving, Chinese New year, Indian holidays and more.
Try to make personal contact with the locals as well. We have come very close mainly to Ohad’s colleagues, with whom we are in contact to this day (four years after our return). The Chinese are less hosts and guests, but very much like to go out for meals and various activities together.
After a little Chinese started rolling on our tongue, we really liked chatting with locals at every opportunity. On our trips around China, our favorite activity was to cycle between the villages, stopping, eating and chatting with the villagers.
10. Transportation
In Shanghai you can definitely get by without a private car. Taxis are many, available and cheap. The subway is excellent, easy to get around, accurate and expands quickly. However, it still doesn’t get everywhere. If you’re not going to a central location, you’ll probably have to walk or take a taxi from the subway station to your destination.
Many foreigners ride electric bikes. It is very convenient for short trips. We preferred to avoid for safety reasons.
A private vehicle is a pretty expensive business, but if it is possible to own a vehicle with a driver, it is very convenient. Shanghai drivers can teach Israelis a lesson in intolerance and aggressiveness on the road. However, it is possible to issue a license and drive (carefully). It is very convenient, especially on weekends and holidays when the driver is on holiday. We have installed a dashboard camera, it is simple and cheap and gives a sense of security. If there’s an accident, you won’t have to make an effort to prove your innocence.
11. Security and Safety
Shanghai is a very safe city, especially for foreigners. You can walk around anywhere, at any time, even boys and girls, without fear. In the four years we’ve been there, I don’t remember a single case where anyone in the community has been the victim of violence. However, like any major city, there are pickpockets and charlatans of all kinds, so it is worth applying a healthy degree of logic.
Safety, however, is another matter. Many Chinese (not all) do not adhere to traffic laws. Electric bikes run in every direction, even against the direction of traffic. Over time, you learn to open your eyes and be careful.
In conclusion, I don’t promise a rose garden. Expect difficulties, ups and downs, sometimes frustration, but overall the balance sheet is very positive – unmediated exposure to fascinating Chinese culture and a variety of cultures from all over the world, language acquisition (English, and those who are also interested in Chinese), amazing private educational frameworks and much more.
If you are ready for a challenge and an unparalleled family experience, and given the opportunity, embrace it with both hands.
